Some people have nightmares.
I have night comedies.
I once started to have a nightmare about a creepy guy following my family home from my sister's wedding. After quickly driving the car into the garage and closing the door, my mother ushered my sisters and I through the basement door with an armload of food leftover from the celebration.
Her frantic voice still echoes through my head: "Hurry, get in the house before this strange man catches us."
But we screamed when the man knocked on the window. Frozen with fear, my family stood in the center of the utility room -- the leftover food still in our grip -- and debated about what to do with this strange trespasser.
He may have an axe and want to kill us.
My father stepped forward, opened the window and demanded to know why the intruder stalked us.
To which, the intruder replied, "All I wanted was a piece of cake."
That's not scary. In fact, I remember that I woke up laughing.
I woke up laughing again on Wednesday morning. You guessed it, another one of those comedic nightmares.
I dreamt that Duran Duran's publicist had set the band up to do an interview with me before their next show.
(Now, I've done a pretty good job keeping it a secret on this blog, but I used to drool rivers over Simon LeBon, Nick Rhodes and John Taylor. Their fresh faces were to die for in the 80s. Mmm, yummy.)
Anyway, back to my dream. I showed up at the hotel where the interview was to take place. The publicist led me into this tiny room with a full-sized brass bed with a tattered comforter covering it. (I actually interview singer-songwriter Max Carl in a room like this before, so this wasn't odd to me.) However, when Mr. Rhodes entered the room with a box of Kleenex in one hand, a cup of tea in the other and a Rudolph-red nose sitting in the center of his face, the dream became surreal.
Following him into the room were two of his other bandmates who helped him climb into bed. They settled in for the interview, but every time I asked a question, Mr. Rhodes would start snoring. Every answer I received was in yes or no form -- even when they weren't yes or no questions.
After two minutes, the interview ended when the publicist walked into the room and said: "I'm sorry, the guys have to get ready to go on stage now, but you're welcome to perform with them if you'd like."
While this irritated the reporter/writer in me, I couldn't pass up such an opportunity. So, I stepped out onto the stage with them and discovered our audience was an entire room full of Geico Geckos dressed in top hats and carrying canes.
Apparently my subconscious had had enough because I woke up just then...laughing at the absurd images playing in my mind.
I've always been proud of my ability to interpret the meaning behind dreams. It's been said they're metaphoric and can help a person make sense of how they perceive the way life goes on around them.
I believe that.
But I'm now sure I want to know what this dream means.